Monday, June 3, 2013

[being-at-work-staying-oneself is] difficult to bring into focus, but possible to be

This isn't a food blog!!! But this is what we are having for dinner, thanks to our church friends who have included lovely meat in our CSA share. The husband works as a butcher at Moody Meats and so he is able to get us eggs and meat along with the vegetables that he and his wife are growing out in the country near where I grew up. I am giddy with health and hippie virtue in the most obnoxious way possible.

I wanted to find a Youtube video of the Drevne Ruski Rospev monastery choir to share with you, because I've been listening to them all morning, but this video of St. Basil's Cathedral with part of their "Now The Powers" is all I can find. It gives you an idea. They are so haunting and peaceful. When I was a junior in college, I would frequently go to sleep listening to their CD "Ancient and Monastic Chants." Although I was diligent in my prayers and fasting, I wasn't going to church very often during that time, unfortunately. My brain was always buzzing about, working through all the mathematical, philosophical and scientific structures that the Enlightenment built with such sanguine hopes. I was going to yoga every day and discovering new strength (I remember the changes in my body so surprised me that I called it a "second puberty.") Socially, I was drunk on popularity, wit, and the favor of my professors. My faith in my own powers was strong. I don't think I ever consciously said "Therefore I needn't go to church," but there is probably some connection. Nevertheless, I always returned to the ancient quiet of this music, and I am sure that it saved me. I wish I could show you more of it. If you are able, you should buy this album.

Thank God that it is summer. Matt just told me about his beginning-of-summer memory that he always returns to. He was walking up the trail to the mountains behind the college, and just before the buildings gave way to the wilderness, he saw a tutor and a student talking and gesticulating with beers from the Santa Fe Brewing Company in hand. It is a small image, but to me it means that the tilling, plowing, and sowing are over, and it is time to let blossom.

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